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I'm sure you can come up with more entertaining one star Amazon reviews than those below. The ten best entries receive a free copy of Dinosaur Claw when it is published.
The rules: be short, be witty, and be creative with the reviewer's name.
Submit your entry using the form below.
The author's grandfather once stood on my toes at a cocktail party and caused me to spill my Martini.
It was an unforgivable lapse of manners and thus, from beyond the grave, I award this book a mere one star.
Kingsley Amis, novelist, deceased.
Surely you can do better?
Place your effort on the form below.
The ten winners each receive a free copy of Dinosaur Claw when it is published.
This is pernicious terrorist propaganda about Black Panthers. Does the author think we're stupid? Read the message hidden in the third sentence of each chapter to reveal his true purpose.
Ray Vingnutter, Supreme Leader (acting), Angloid Racial Supremacy Enclave.
A book that will surely cause a house price slump in Surrey.
The author is a traitor to all that makes Britain great.
The Daily Moral Panic (whoops, sorry, The Daily Mail)
A golden opportunity wasted shamefully.
Advocates the killing of property developers and Russian billionaires by an escaped big cat, but ignores the deeper social ills bedevilling our society.
The Guardian
Sumwun tolled me it was about cats.
I love cats. Then I sore the cover and it scaired me so I haven't' read the buk. LOL. YouTube videos of cats are much nicer.
@KitTenlitter1982
Get a grip, Amazon.
It took 72.91 seconds to download onto my Kindle instead of the average of 8.56 seconds. OK, so it may have been because I had not switched on my Wi-Fi router, but I am so annoyed I'm going to give it one star anyway.
K. Ray Seeman
Utter Rubbish.
Don't buy it. Buy my books instead.
Jay Lusorther
Drivel of the worst kind.
Don't buy it. And don't buy any of J.Lusorther's books either. Buy mine.
S.Ockpuppet.
